Thursday, August 18, 2011


     I HAVE often thought this way, but often my thinking is wrong. How glad I was to read that I'm actually right for once.  Is the way a husband responds to his wife the reason the son responds to his mother in such a manner?  Could it be that the reason a daughter treats her father with contempt is because the mother treats him with contempt?  Could it be that a mouthy wife encourages other women to be mouthy to their husbands? Could it be...that our actions REALLY DO influence others, more so than we would like to admit.  Could it be that our behavior has and is even NOW influencing, for the worse, another human being and having a negative impact upon a relationship somewhere else, in another home?  Verse 17..."for the queen's conduct will become know to all the women....will respond to all the king's nobles in the same way"  (Read the rest for yourself) What are these advisers saying? "This is not just going to stop here but this will now affect other men in homes all over.  Is the an exaggeration?  If so, why does God allow this to be written and not corrected with what some might think would be a "proper balance".  The reason is....there is no proper balance, it is what it is.
     We don't want to have that responsibility placed upon our shoulders.  Are you telling me my loose tongue is now causing damage in other homes?  Yes!   Are you telling me my short temper is now causing damage in other homes?  Yes!  Are you telling me the way I speak to my husband is affecting my daughter's relationship with her father?  Yes!  Are you telling me my disrespect for my husband is actually cause other women in the church to disrespect their husband?  Yes!  Verse 18 "there will be no end of disrespect and discord".   Is the subject matter here..disrespect or discord?  The answer of course is BOTH!  They always travel together, ie: disrespect & discord.  Where there is disrespect you will ALWAYS find discord.  So now, not only is the flippant attitude of one woman causing other women to become flippant, but now it is causing fighting in homes all over.  If you are a person of influence you have a God given responsibility to hold your tongue and exercise self-control; if not for the sake of your own home then for the sake of other women and their homes.  The king was left with no choice but to make an example of Queen Vashti otherwise this would do damage through out all the Provinces. 
     How is the Christian husband who deals with this today to make an example of his wife?  We read that the king does it by "sending her away".  However this will not work for a modern day Christian. We cannot simply divorce our wives or "send them away" because of disrespect (although some do).  In short, the husband today has no recourse, but to pray and contend for change; thence the damage that is prevented in our text, is not prevented in our churches (our provinces) today and the bad effect of one, two or three women can spread, and does spread, like wild fire, through out the church.  Everybody knows the mantra "do as I say and not as I do" is not one  anyone would want to claim is "their mantra".  However, when it comes to this area, it is the mantra of many women.  Even worse would be the woman who does not condemn her own behavior but proudly boasts about it and encourages other women to do like wise.
     In being fair, I want to say that any woman, no matter how good natured, would have been frustrated to have been in Queen Vashti's position that day. This is not about excusing the King's undignified behaviour towards his wife, but surely the Queen, with her wisdom and beauty could have found a more tactful way to deal with the situation. And this is conjecture, but I have a sneak'in suspicion that this was not the first time (rarely is it the first time when someone is picked to be "the example) she had behaved like this, perhaps this was the first time she was caught in public, but I doubt it was the first time. God is more merciful than that; than to take some poor woman who slipped one time, under duress and make such an example out of her. Either way, the point is our behaviour does effect others and women especially have the power and ability to affect their daughters and other women's dispositions, attitudes and behaviour towards the men in their lives. Use that power wisely and responsibly, God forbid there is discord in another man's home, because of you.