Thursday, August 18, 2016


     How can we both be right?  Easy, happens all the time.  Where do you stand in this story?  If you're a man then you probably will take sides with the man, "can't have a woman dissing her husband in front of all those people, especially a man of that authority, what kind of precedent would that make?  Hmmm, true.
     If you're a woman then you will probably take sides with the woman, "you have to stand up for yourself, if you don't respect yourself, then who will. He thinks he's going to get all drunk with his friends and then call me over in front of his drunk friends and parade me in front of them....I don't think so!"  Hmmm, true.
He should not be getting drunk with his friends and then for entertainment be thinking of having his wife come parade in front of them so they can all gawk and grope at her, c'mon....she should not be disrespecting her husband in front of all his friends and setting a bad example for other woman to follow that probably look up to the Queen. If you just take the side of your gender, it's an easy decision to make of who's right and who's wrong. But if you want to judge fairly and put gender preference aside, it is very difficult to rule in this matter, except to say, "you're both right and you're both wrong!". Some of the fiercest fights between couples are based on the fact that each side has a legitimate claim, against the other spouse and neither is willing to back down. Who's right, who's wrong? In this case they're both right and both wrong. I'm looking at this from the outside in, so it's easy for me to see that they are both right and both wrong, but as you know, when you're in the thick of it, and you're all fired up, it's not so easy to step back and judge your own conflict without partiality. Difficult, yes, impossible, no! This is why every marriage needs the trinity of you, your spouse and Jesus. In every fight, every argument, Jesus can be and will be, that impartial, neutral witness than can illuminate to each individual their wrong and right. Many times after a heated argument, when i finally settled down and went to pray or sometimes not even when I was praying, the Holy Spirit was faithful to convict me of my actions, my words and totally dismantle the case I had set up in my mind, acquitted me of all wrong doing. Many, many times the Holy Spirit has shown both my wife and I, "you're both right and you're both wrong" now stop fighting, apologize, kiss and make up. I truly do feel sorry for couples desperately trying to make a go at marriage, trying hard and failing, without the help of Jesus in that marriage. It is not surprise the divorce rate is over 50% and quite frankly I'm surprised it's not over 70%. We will fight to the death of our marriages to prove we were right and we were done wrong. Every crumbling marriage has a person in each corner, with their arms crossed, very angry, pointing the finger at the other spouse and shouting, "I'm right, they're wrong", that's all their is to it. It's a sad state of affairs in many homes today and what's worse is kids get stuck in the middle. Can it be, you're both right and you're both wrong?